Take 2:
With Saturday Nights ultimate failure on getting K to go to bed. Sunday we introduced a new approach. I had forgotten that in the beginning days of K sleeping in the toddler bed we use to put two baby gates up. One on top of the other. He could climb over just the one, and with the stairs I just feared he would get out and no one would hear him and down the stairs he would go. So the new plan was to go back to the old plan.
2 Gates it is!
This was not well received. He cried, kicked, and finally crashed and went to sleep at the door of his room. For fear of waking him we let him stay there through the night. Such a terrible feeling to listen to your child cry and just stand in the other room trying to hold yourself back from going in there.
Take 3-9:
The 2 gate thing was too heart wrenching for me. With the house officially on the market now we have to stay on top of all the cleaning, so I persuaded the hubby to help me finish the laundry while we put K down. We could complete the folding and hanging in the guest room, which is right next to K’s room. Let him know we will be close by, but not have to listen to the crying. It breaks my heart.
It went well the 1st night. We were in the guest room and he only got out of bed a few times. I got the added bonus of having someone help me with the mounds of laundry…it is amazing how much my laundry level goes up with the husband at home. We will have to have a talk about that sometime soon. The next week of this plan was better but not perfect. He would get up and yell for me or his daddy. We would walk in the room and lay him back down to bed. After about an hour of the up –down up- down he would finally give way and not be able to get up that one last time. The major downfall to this was that he was still getting up at around 1 or 2 am and doing the whole back and forth thing again…
Take 10 & 11: One More Kiss Mommy
So the threatening with the 2nd baby gate definitely works. K hates the 2nd gate going on top of the 1st gate so much that if you just tell him you are going to do it he starts to get upset. Not that I like to make my child upset, but at the same time I need to sleep as much as he does!
However, he has a new trick. He comes to the door and calls for you, you go in all prepared to tell him to get back in bed, and he says in that little cute boy voice “one more kiss mommy”. How do you say no? So then you help him back into bed, tell him again if he gets out you are going to put the 2nd gate up. He says yes mam and you leave. The frequency is starting to slow. Now only about 3-4 back and forth trips and he will be out for the night. He has also gone down to just 1 middle of the night interruption. I think it is really sleep walking. I did that when I was younger. He gets up and asks for you and kind of stumbles around, but what I have found is that whether I pick him up and put him back in bed with me, or put him back in his bed, either way he goes back to sleep. I just need to be sure I am coherent enough to make sure I put him back in his bed. After 2 ½ years of bringing him to our bed…sometimes I just walk back to our room out of habit.
Almost there:
Last night we went to bed at 9pm! Read a book, climbed in, hugged mommy and daddy, only got out of bed once and stayed there. K awoke at 5:45 am and I put him in bed with us, to tell you the truth at that point there is no use fighting it. We both have to be out of bed soon anyway so you might as well put him in your bed. Then he sleeps while you get ready which makes the morning go much smoother. But whoooo….I am hoping that we are finally through this and I pray that with the pending move it doesn’t start back up.
On a side note, the hubby and I have decided for sure that although we always though a Queen sized bed would be large enough, it most certainly is not and we will be upgrading to a King as soon as we can!
Friday, May 15, 2009
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Bed Time Battles
As a parent I expected it to be difficult. I knew there would be challenges. I know there are worse things I will have to over come as a Mom later down the line. But, I must say that right now, Bedtime is the Battle at the Home front these days.
My son was a dream to put to bed. My mother was astonished when she came to visit in March. Then In-laws were amazed when they were here in December. Me, I just assumed all kids did this. I would take my bounding bundle of joy upstairs and we would follow our nightly routine. Teeth brushed, puppy in hand, blanket tag in hand (whole other blog, but basically my son rubs the tag in between his two fingers as he sleeps), pick out a book for me to read and a book for him, halfway through the story we would switch books leading me to paraphrase the new book as he always picks out a Disney book that is about 30 pages long and takes 20-30 minutes to get through. We would say our good nights, give each other a kiss, he would wave bye bye, I would shut the light out and that would be all I would hear of him till 4 or 5 am, at which point it is too late to battle and I would just put him in bed with me for the remaining time I had to sleep before work.
It was great. Blissful even. Like a clock where the arms go round everyday just the same as the day before.
Then, as the Big Steel Stick known as CVN-71 pulled up pier side in Norfolk, unbeknown to me, a gust of wind blew past my little man and took with him the ability to go to bed without a tragic fight.
It all began about 2 weeks before my husband return. K wouldn’t go to sleep with the lights off anymore. I had talked to his sitter about one of the older boys telling him scary stories and about monsters and asked for her to watch out for that. A child who has no fear all of a sudden telling me that Dragondaurs (yes Dragon + Dinosaur) lives under his bed. Seeing as we have no books and/or toys and/or movies about either of these beings I can only assume that it is another lovely thing he picked up at Day Care, along with a cold or a new knot on his head.
As much as I disliked it, I could handle the light thing. Kids go through stages and we have the light dimmers, so I would just dim the light all the way down and when I went to bed shut it off. The rest of the routine stayed the same.
Well until Daddy entered the equation again.
It is partly my fault for humoring a 2 year old. And I am hoping partly the fault of the US Navy for taking my husband away for 222 days to protect the rights of a seemingly unappreciative American population. Whatever the reason, K no longer wanted to go to bed alone. I humored him by sitting at the end of the bed while he drifted to sleep. It gave me some quite time as well and gave me an opportunity to read my book (Twilight…not sure if I am hooked yet, but it is a good read). After about 15-20 minutes I could exit the room with no resistance. I should have never honored this request. I should have known it would be my ultimate doom.
After two weeks of this edge of the bed sitting he was no longer falling asleep. Rather every attempt you would make to get up he was wide eyed and bushy tailed like he hadn’t been laying down, seemingly snoring for the past 20 minutes. It was frustrating and tiring. I should have known that he would see how much more he could get away with. So the battle begins…
Saturday night was the 1st official battle. I pronounced myself to him as the winner before things really even go going. Up and down, back and fourth to bed. Over the baby gate to the hallway the little feet would run every 10 minutes or so. I resolved myself to sit just outside the door. Made it quicker to get him to bed. Then as the furry within me started to boil over after 2 hours of this, spanking was introduced. Up and down, back and fourth, crying, screaming, telling me to get my book and sit with him. Then I decided I couldn’t spank him anymore. My heart was no longer able to stand it…so to time out we went. He would cry in the corner then come and say he was sorry. I would ask if he was ready to go to bed and he would say yes. We would get upstairs and he would ask me to get the book and sit with him. No I would say you have to go to bed, do you want to go back to the corner? The response was always yes. Finally at 2 am he fell asleep in the corner. This was a bad idea on my part. The second I took him upstairs he was awake and wanted me to stay. I laid him down and fell asleep on the floor in his room. The little stinker won!!
More to tell…stay tuned!
My son was a dream to put to bed. My mother was astonished when she came to visit in March. Then In-laws were amazed when they were here in December. Me, I just assumed all kids did this. I would take my bounding bundle of joy upstairs and we would follow our nightly routine. Teeth brushed, puppy in hand, blanket tag in hand (whole other blog, but basically my son rubs the tag in between his two fingers as he sleeps), pick out a book for me to read and a book for him, halfway through the story we would switch books leading me to paraphrase the new book as he always picks out a Disney book that is about 30 pages long and takes 20-30 minutes to get through. We would say our good nights, give each other a kiss, he would wave bye bye, I would shut the light out and that would be all I would hear of him till 4 or 5 am, at which point it is too late to battle and I would just put him in bed with me for the remaining time I had to sleep before work.
It was great. Blissful even. Like a clock where the arms go round everyday just the same as the day before.
Then, as the Big Steel Stick known as CVN-71 pulled up pier side in Norfolk, unbeknown to me, a gust of wind blew past my little man and took with him the ability to go to bed without a tragic fight.
It all began about 2 weeks before my husband return. K wouldn’t go to sleep with the lights off anymore. I had talked to his sitter about one of the older boys telling him scary stories and about monsters and asked for her to watch out for that. A child who has no fear all of a sudden telling me that Dragondaurs (yes Dragon + Dinosaur) lives under his bed. Seeing as we have no books and/or toys and/or movies about either of these beings I can only assume that it is another lovely thing he picked up at Day Care, along with a cold or a new knot on his head.
As much as I disliked it, I could handle the light thing. Kids go through stages and we have the light dimmers, so I would just dim the light all the way down and when I went to bed shut it off. The rest of the routine stayed the same.
Well until Daddy entered the equation again.
It is partly my fault for humoring a 2 year old. And I am hoping partly the fault of the US Navy for taking my husband away for 222 days to protect the rights of a seemingly unappreciative American population. Whatever the reason, K no longer wanted to go to bed alone. I humored him by sitting at the end of the bed while he drifted to sleep. It gave me some quite time as well and gave me an opportunity to read my book (Twilight…not sure if I am hooked yet, but it is a good read). After about 15-20 minutes I could exit the room with no resistance. I should have never honored this request. I should have known it would be my ultimate doom.
After two weeks of this edge of the bed sitting he was no longer falling asleep. Rather every attempt you would make to get up he was wide eyed and bushy tailed like he hadn’t been laying down, seemingly snoring for the past 20 minutes. It was frustrating and tiring. I should have known that he would see how much more he could get away with. So the battle begins…
Saturday night was the 1st official battle. I pronounced myself to him as the winner before things really even go going. Up and down, back and fourth to bed. Over the baby gate to the hallway the little feet would run every 10 minutes or so. I resolved myself to sit just outside the door. Made it quicker to get him to bed. Then as the furry within me started to boil over after 2 hours of this, spanking was introduced. Up and down, back and fourth, crying, screaming, telling me to get my book and sit with him. Then I decided I couldn’t spank him anymore. My heart was no longer able to stand it…so to time out we went. He would cry in the corner then come and say he was sorry. I would ask if he was ready to go to bed and he would say yes. We would get upstairs and he would ask me to get the book and sit with him. No I would say you have to go to bed, do you want to go back to the corner? The response was always yes. Finally at 2 am he fell asleep in the corner. This was a bad idea on my part. The second I took him upstairs he was awake and wanted me to stay. I laid him down and fell asleep on the floor in his room. The little stinker won!!
More to tell…stay tuned!
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